Living between Hope and getting my hopes up…too high.

Is it just me…or do any of you find yourself figuring out how God is going to fix your life?

I am in an inbetween time of life. And let’s face it…all of us are. As we’re all trying to figure out how to cope with life’s struggles while having hope and faith that God will keep His promises. That He will repay us for the years of locusts. That He will exchange beauty for ashes.

So here we are, about to go to another one of our daughters seminars “lesbians who tech”.

In New York City. And it’s September 22.

So we’re having breakfast and will enjoy the day God has provided. (Btw…best quiche ever at the Cornelia’s Street Cafe)

If you read our story in my book you know how important that date is.  But the short story… it’s the date we found out about how God showed up just hours before the death of our son! But since it’s a huge rabbit hole, just trust me…it’s an important date.

So today…with us being here would be very easy to allow myself to get carried away. To conjur up all sorts of scenerious on how God will bring my daughter back. Then I wake up!

So as soon as I feel myself feeling like a ball in a pinball machine I take a breath. I may even need to repent in that I am making my own plans. (Ouch). I return to Gods word and take in His promises. He will never leave me…He has His hands upon me.

I don’t get to write His script. And feel a little foolish that I even tried.

So to answer my own question…I stop trying to get the pinball to score points. And trust that God has a way better plan.

Because none of this makes sense.

And yea! Our daughter just texted us. We are on our way to help. Which means we get to spend the day with her!


I can’t share as much as I’d like. But I will say God exceeeded my expectations as my book landed in the hands of someone pretty famous in our country. Someone that could change the face of homosexuality if they came to know the Lord. Please join me in prayer that it could make a difference in these trying times.

I invite you to stay tuned.

And if you like to know who this person was click here!

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